death picture scene timothy treadwell

Im just really sad.

i do miss him i guess.

i feel like shit when im by myself.

im being so stupid...by calling..

wow it already been a month.
a month since he told me hes moved on,

a month since he told me he has a new baby..or babe..


wow.

why am i still stuck..
how long will it take me?

if hes happy without me,,then i have to respect that and move on too right?

but, how can i move on...should i be like him and get a new boyfriend?

but im not going to go fuck anyone..like he does..

thats not fair for my future husband.


you know what i miss?? ( your name should not be matthew because that was someone else..you can be a girl..hrm your name should be holly)//


i miss how cute he was everytime i bothered him..he would make this angry face or tell me to get off..but it was just so adorable i couldnt stop.

i miss going everywhere with him,, holding hands,,and whenever he kissed me on the cheek..i would feel goosbumps..
i miss eating at restauraunts,,and when i wanted hot sauce he would ask or get it..
i miss his..petty but witty remarks..
i miss how i could never win..

i miss him..

but what i dont miss
him,,checking out all the girls that walk by,,but deny that he did.
him cheating on me.
him hanging up on me,,ignroing me..
him being a fucking dick..
him lying..


so what am i to him?
nothing.
im still here. Im still hopelessly waiting without even knowing i am..
thinking about it every fucking day..

but hes making new memories, hes erased all of ours..
and im nothing to him.

im just something he did, something he experienced..

and i dont know what to do.


should i get with jj oppa?
i love his body...i loveeeeeeeeeeeeee his niceness,,his personality..how we can talk and talk..
but...damn it... You know waht the problem is holly??????/ its tooo superficiall..i canapos;t say..
but if your girl ..you should know too..ehheehehe...

i really do like his body and his clothes..

his body almost better than you know whos...





its been a month ..
a freaking month.
when will i be okay?

when???


god damn it.

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